Creating Bad Habits– In my recent days I’ve began to start watching some YouTube videos on how to get a baby to sleep through the night. I haven’t worried about it much to this point as Bekytt’s adjusted age is still under 2 months (yes I know Katie T, I said he would be by now), but I’m definitely craving the days when it happens. Like any other baby topic, the advice is endless and inconsistent. There is the cry it out (CIO) side, the attachment parenting side. Most say stick to a routine. Many say don’t rock him to sleep or he’ll always have to be rocked to sleep. You can’t spoil a newborn. Habits won’t start forming until 6 months. Sleep train during the day not at night. It’s enough to make your head spin. And all of us our desperate for sleep so we just keep filling our heads with different advice hoping something will stick.
They say you don’t have to decide if you’re a CIO or Attachment fan until the baby is 4-6 months because no sleep training should start before then. The problem is, no working mom is off for that long. So we crave sleep way before then. I got tempted to start sleep training now so I started searching for something or someone to tell me it was ok to start now. There are times Bekytt can go three hours at night so we must be getting close, right? After all, sleeping through the night actually only means sleeping for 6 hours straight. Hmmm. Six hours? Could I go 6 hours without pumping? Do I then have to wake myself to pump anyway to risk drying up or mastitis? My search switched. And again, more information overload with no consistency. Most will say yes pump. Some say if you’re exclusively breastfeeding, follow the baby’s schedule and you’ll be fine. Other experts say breastfeeding goes both ways. If you feel you need to empty your breasts, wake the baby to eat. Really? Interesting thought, and I’m not saying I don’t agree, but I can’t keep my awake to eat most of the time let alone think of waking him to eat. Then again, will I ever even get to the point of having to make a decision? And is it 6 months adjusted age or 6 months chronological that I can make a decision by about the night time sleeping thing?
To date, I still don’t really know if I can let him go more than 4 hours without eating. I don’t think I’ve gotten a clear answer on that at our last few appointments anyway. All I know is that I am convinced I have already started forming some really bad habits. He will only calm when crying if I am walking, or swaying, or bouncing on a physioball. He has fallen asleep nursing and despite the advice, I have not tried to keep him awake to eat more. He is 17 weeks/7 adjusted and he is only eating 1.5-2 oz a feeding (we know that because of the amazing Adria at the Happy Bambino), but he is gaining weight and thriving so clearly it is enough. And I actally feel lucky when he falls asleep nursing. We do not have a routine in place for him, but we do bathe him a few times a week and I think he likes that! That is until he comes out of the water and he acts like we just stole candy from him with the saddest quivering lip cry ever. I used to be able to read to him and loved it, but now unless I read over a screaming baby there is no reading time. Which I do hate because I swear I became a parent so I could read kids books again and watch cartoons and just be a kid again myself. Well, one day. The only other baby book I listened to on “tape” was Brain Rules and this also talks about music so we do at least do that thanks to Alexa! I think Bekytt likes the Beatles the best personally. Good taste. But my whole point to this rambling is right now, whatever Bekytt likes, mom and dad like. We do what calms him down. What lets him sleep. And if that means he needs to be rocked or bounced to sleep, I’d rather be doing that than sitting on my butt, letting it get sore for hours because he does not calm. So rock on parents! You do what you gotta do in each and every moment, and we’ll deal with the consequences later I say. All kids will need therapy one day anyway! Or at least we all should go to therapy as it is truly good for the soul. –Kathryn Kraft, MPT.